- [[How long to date before going official]] ## Reasons ### Show commitment - Just means that you're wanting to put in as much commitment as you might not have previously or just when dating - Helps show that commitment on both sides, continuing to make progress rather than be left wondering - I don't really feel like it's a big step either way--you can get together just as easily as you can get out of a relationship. I'd rather feel forward progress in a relationship than be left wondering what going on. Commitment isn't some kind of handcuffs that everyone seems to think it is. ### Detachment the term “boyfriend” means this person has seen my imperfections, perhaps we have a fielded a few speed bumps together, and we are committed to working through life together as a team from now on, and to turning towards each other to keep building the team spirit. Before this level of commitment, you gotta see the person in many situations, and in essence, you gotta keep your evaluating brain turned on. So I try to keep this slow. I’ll be together with you after date two if it feels right! But for the next few months we have to do stuff together and actively date. Meet friends, go through new situations together, take a short trip, see them try something new and how they handle that, experience some bad days, see how they handle stress, get comfortable enough that the walls come down and we get to see who they are.