## Notes - [[Do not use phones when socializing]] - [[Judging a date]] - [[Dating profile]] - [[Sex]] ## Highlights you should be boring because that means you're secure people should change their ideals to be receptive to secure people it's not your fault people expect you to be unavailable avoided people just need to focus on the positives fuckboys have a partial reward system, which makes it addicting. consistency is most important anxious avoidant loop anxious disconfirming evidence distractions avoidant need space diary of a ceo has an interesting story - anxious avoidant she (anxious) romantically did not feel physically artracted, he went out of his avoidant way to chase her date environments are very important - who feela flirty at 7am in starbucks perfect environment sober is better what part of you comes out? can you have an environment that emphasizes parts of you? people want play, to have fun and romantic playful energy. date like a scientist with hypothesis don't let your filters unreasonably restrictive have good phoje hygiene you dont feel safe being vulnerable if phone is open since you can be distracted and check it show things after not during the date skip small talk - people are drawn to emotional vulnerability. share stories, not facts people look for non perfect so they can also feel safe with their vulnerabilities the things that you feel like prevent you from being desirable are actually your vulnerabilities and is what makes you attractive don't judge face on their qualities, judge on how you are together - You cannot hustle your way into a relationship, like other goals - What is your digital body language saying? - don't make someone a priority when you are an option - ick is sudden reason why you're not interested in someone - this shit is so fucked LOL, i imagined a bus and running to the bus and it annoyed me - ready to pay, open wallet and its velcro - you get social capital for icks, becomes datertainment - post date eight is for experiential over requirements - is interest trending upwards? - most important - hinge tips - clear headshot with face - photo doing activity - photo with family or friends - full body picture - tell a whole story - great sex is losing yourself and be fully present, put yourself into a different place - a deep connection from being present, taking risks, tuning in with the other person