[[Social love and connection is the most enlivening need]] The ideal type of love for yourself and others is [[Secure attachment style]] ## Notes - The Art of Loving - love can only be given, not asked - real love happens when you choose to love despite not feeling like your needs are being met by them, and not feeling resentful for it. this is [[Selfishness]] - love is a way in which the [[Will]] moves, not sole mover - love is perspectival knowing - "You must cultivate activities that you love. You must discover work that you do, not for its utility, but for itself, whether it succeeds or not, whether you are praised for it or not, whether you are loved and rewarded for it or not, whether people know about it and are grateful to you for it or not. How many activities can you count in your life that you engage in simply because they delight you and grip your soul? Find them out, cultivate them, for they are your passport to freedom and to love." - > "a combination of chemistry, curiosity, and compatibility that creates a sense of excitement and possibility with another person. It's the feeling that you have something special and unique with them, that you share a similar worldview and values, and that you enjoy each other's company." ### Origins - all popular culture is fuelled for search of magical other - based on lack of parental love - you try to find someone with the love you were neglected as a child - don't use relationship as infantile escapism ### Types kantian view on love is based on attitude, that values self respect by not hindering their self love as action differentiates it from care love as an action also accomodates for neurodivergence the same way ecological psychology does ## Queries ### Notes ```dataview list from [[]] AND !outgoing([[]]) AND !#input AND !#thought AND !"Hidden" sort file.mtime desc ``` ### Inputs ```dataview table Tags as Type, Links, Created from [[]] AND #input AND !"Hidden" AND !outgoing([[]]) sort file.mtime desc ``` ### Thoughts ```dataview table Created from [[]] AND #thought AND !"Hidden" AND !outgoing([[]]) sort file.mtime desc ```