we only feel alive when we escape from seeing ourselves as a constant project narcissism is normalized because it is the most effective way to treat your self as a project this is done through situations of flow state and spontaneity where you engage in things for intrinsic reasons, diminishing your ego It's interesting how he says to just have a very generalist lifestyle to overcome this dilemma. I like to think I already do just because of the nature of ADHD and the different things I am interested in. I like to think I already am at least not in the extreme end of this, I haven't been following my time blocks completely and have been following more so my energy levels and opportunities that arise, I do engage in a lot of intrinsically motivating activities that have no productive purpose or I'm not too strict on like learning Japanese, playing and watching valorant, having conversations with friends. I don't feel the need to stay fit and do most of the things I do out of external pressure that is self-imposed, The only problem is that I also need to do my part in the world and that is where the self-improvement can come into play not for that sense of service but also because I need to survive and earn an income from something. if I don't optimize then I won't have time to do those intrinsically motivating activities. I'll be stuck working 9-5 to still be unable to afford a home, living paycheck to paycheck. im definitely sipping the r/antiwork koolaid right now but i just dont think that is what life is supposed to be like. i couldn't fathom retiring at 65. i think my depression does partially come from it, but I think its also because i live in a basement 💀